Back in action.

We just returned from a small vacation as a family. It was fun and crazy. I am trying bit by bit to find more enjoyment in the small things in life. I have begun to see the changes that the reading the book of Mormon daily has had on my life and anxiety. I know that we are here on this earth to find happiness. I know that the plan of salvation is also called the plan of happiness. Living the gospel and finding the gospel centered focus that scripture reading can bring, brings true and lasting happiness. I have begun climbing uphill and no longer sitting down at the bottom wondering "why all this is happening to me?" I will trust in my Heavenly Father and his plan for my life!

Life used to be so easy!

Today my daughter asked me "Mommy don't you wish we could fly?" I thought about it and responded "yes, sometimes" She got mad because she REALLY, REALLY wishes we could fly. I remember as a child wishing I could fly so bad! Now as an adult that seems a lot less important.
Not only was life easier as a child, but so was having faith. In the scriptures it tells us to come unto Christ as a little child, humble, meek and submissive. When we were children it was so easy to just KNOW that the Savior loved us. Now as adults we have been kicked around by life and have lost some of that innocence. I guess that is one of the true tests in this life, do we still have faith even after all of our trials?

Life...

Tonight for FHE we learned about faith. We also practiced the song "Faith" from the primary songbook. This was so relevant to me, in the midst of my latest 'heightened anxiety'!

Faith is knowing the sun will rise lighting each new day
Faith is knowing the Lord will hear my prayers each time I pray
Faith is like a little seed If planted, it will grow
Faith is a swelling within my heart When I do right I know

I know the Lord will not take away my problems, but He will give me the tools to handle them. Sometimes I think if we just have a small amount of faith and give all that we can give, the Savior will make up the difference. I know that my faith is no where near Alma or Nephi's but I am giving all I can right now! Tonight as I taught that lesson to my children I thought about how easy the gospel is... whenever we are struggling and in the midst of difficult times we need to get back to the basics that are taught in primary.

Nothing is as wonderful as a new baby!

My two sisters have recently had babies, as I hold them I yearn for another. I LOVE newborn babies. I intensely remember the moment they laid each of my three children in my arms for the first time having that powerful experience of love come into my heart. I felt like I was remembering the love for that child and spirit I have always had for them, something I have always felt and known. Moments after each child's birth I literally cannot remember what it was like to not have that child apart of my life. There is such a deep spiritual connection between a mother and her child and each birth has been one of the most spiritual experiences of my life. I know I want more children, I know there are more spirits, I also know that having them will not be without challenges and struggles. I know that when I look at each one of my children I would go through those difficult pregnancies again for each one of them 1,000 times because I love them that much!

My personal Book of Mormon challenge...

I have decided to challenge myself to read the Book of Mormon by my birthday. I will start tonight and that gives me a little over 3 months. I know that in times past when I have poured over my scriptures instead of just 'reading so I can mention it in Sunday school' Changes have come into my life that have power, my spirit is literally shaped into something it longs to be. I will keep you updated on my progress!

Sometimes He lets it rain.

Sometimes He lets it rain
He lets the fierce winds blow
Sometimes it takes a storm
to lead a heart where it can grow

He can move mountains of grief
and oceans of pain.
But sometimes he lets it rain.

When her heart surrenders
to the master in control
Her spirit learns the lessons
and the tempest in her soul

when it's no longer raging
She can see how far she's come
through the wisdom and
the mercy of the son

Sung by- Katherine Nelson

I feel this is the 'theme' song for my life lately! I suppose without the 'rain' my heart will never grow to where it needs to be! I was touched so deeply when I heard this song and I hope it can be of comfort to you as well!

You inspire me.

I love this video and am deeply touched by it! I just know if we were to meet we would become dear friends!